i am totally addicted to reading dooce
i like her style. she's an amazing writer. she also has mad photog skills.
so, anyway, she recently wrote a post with a link to a news story from florida. i will warn you...this story involves a disgusting case of child abuse and neglect. however, it is an amazing story.
here's the link to heather's post
and, seriously, go hug your kids.
i've had an overactive brain lately and have been frozen in place trying to figure out where to start first. here are my recent thoughts in no particular order...
* pool safety: if you own a pool (and when i say pool, i don't mean the kind you blow up), in my humble opinion, it would behoove you to learn and be able to correctly execute CPR & first aid. especially if (but not limited to) you have young children or grandchildren who will be swimming in said pool. and specifically if any of said children are the fruit of my womb. although i know that (the general) you would never do anything to intentionally harm our children, please accept the fact that accidents do happen...even at your house...even when you don't mean for them to.
* customer service: if you work in some area of customer service (you'd be surprised how many people do), please remember that although the customer may not always be right, the customer is always the customer. learn how to say things with a smile (even when it is your 11th of a scheduled 12 hour shift of listening to people complain about ridiculous things that you have no control over). watch the tone of your voice. listen to how you talk to people and what you say to them. is it the way you would like to be treated? if not, either change your attitude or find a new job.
* general niceities: puh-leese say please and thank you. if you see someone in need, help them if you can...hold the door open for someone who has their arms full... smile at the mom/dad in the grocery store with their 4 kids who looks like they're going to pull their hair out...sometimes, if you're able, pay for the person behind you in line somewhere -- you'd be surprised how receiving a cup of coffee that a perfect stranger paid for could change their day...if you see someone on the side of the road stranded for God's sake, don't let them in your car, but call help for them...every once in a while, send out "thinking of you" cards or emails to let your friends and family know that you love them and you are thinking about them...volunteer (anywhere).
* etiquette: a friend of mine called to tell me a story about how they had recently had houseguests for a long weekend (5 days)...we'll call my friend "dorothy" for the sake of this story. so, dorothy, her husband and their kids hosted her husband's sister & her husband, and their dog...and their new baby. dorothy and her husband had really been looking forward to the visit...although they don't live far from each other (about 1/2 a day's drive), they don't see each other much. anyway, their guests arrived and all was well...for about the first day. their guests had lots of things they wanted to do...places to go...places to eat...places to shop...but, as you may know, everything costs money and the guests never seemed to be interested in paying. they also didn't seem to be very interested in taking care of their baby or dog. for example -- they were all out on the deck one night waiting for supper to cook on the grill when they heard the baby on the monitor waking up from his nap...but no one moved. then, dorothy's SIL asked if dorothy could go get the baby. now, of course, this isn't a lot to ask, but SIL was just sitting in a chair reading a book and drinking a beer. the in-laws didn't even pick up the dog poop while they were there...my friend and her family don't have a dog...so they don't have poop to pick up. the in-laws never even offered to help cook or do dishes. they went to visit and expected to be waited on hand and foot.
the moral of the story is...please be considerate of others...even if they invite you to their house...other people don't expect to be your personal servants while you visit their home. offer to help cook...or if you're not a good cook, offer to do the dishes. you're more likely to be invited back and your hosts are less likely to hate having you there. if you have a dog (or other pet), for crying out loud, pick up after them! be a good guest!
* gasoline: can anyone explain to me why when one of the futures guys on wallstreet even thinks that the price of oil might go up, the price of gas shoots up by 30 cents per gallon or more? but when the price of oil actually goes down, it takes almost a week for the price of gas to go down 25 cents per gallon? just wondering. i thought maybe someone out in internet-land might know the secret formula.
* swingsets: recently we brought our old swingset to where we live now so the kids can use it again. they LOVE it! i didn't realize how much they missed it until we brought it here. we've all been swinging on it. it is the swingset that my sisters and i had when we were little girls. my dad bought it from the parks department where we lived, so it is huge and sturdy. it's awesome! we had to buy sammysosa a new baby swing...the ropes on the other one were unraveling (i thought that might present a safety problem).
*voluntarily coaching young children in voluntary sports: ok, well, i would think that this would go without actually having to say it, but apparently not. if you are a coach of something (anything, really) and there are young children involved, please keep the following in mind:
that's enough about that. i have to go have a piece of chocolate now. until later...
today we went to a local park...one where my parents took us when we were little girls. there is a pond/lake-ish type thing, swings, teeter-totters, a giant climbing apparatus, tennis courts, a shelter for picnicing, and a wide open soccer field. we had a fabulous time. it was the first time in a long time that mr. husband has been off of work for more than 12 hours at a time...we've really been enjoying each other...all of us. mr. husband and i sort of naturally switched off with the kids, as they changed interests at the park...i played with them on the swings and he took them to the soccer field to kick the giant tennis ball we brought. little sammysosa had a great time between the merry-go-round and the swings. he giggled his little heart out.
captain adventure and sammysosa sharing a snack on the merry-go-round
finally a peaceful brother-sister moment. 
i will always
i really don't think that i need to say anything here. i'll let the pictures do the talking.
we've been having a number of conversations about possible summer activities. i have never been one to "overschedule" our kids...mostly because then, i'd be overscheduling myself, since i am their taxi and chaperone. we've always done little things like the library reading program, swimming lessons, and of corse play dates with friends. however, we've been reconsidering our position on summertime activities. due to captain adventure's recent and increasingly prevalent shenanigans,we've decided to look for some things that he and his sister could be involved in. here's what we have so far...
little mother hen is already going to reading camp for 4 weeks. captain adventure is now going to 6 1-week sessions of camp at his school. they are both taking swimming lessons. LMH wants to take gymnastics (like her mother did when she was a girl, by the way.), and a 2 day martial arts class. captain adventure wants to play t-ball.
so, it looks like we're going to have a busier summer than i planned. that's ok. with the chaos in our house right now, i think this is a good idea. they need a little more structure than we have right now...and they need more of a schedule than we have right now. truth be told, their brains turn do mush every summer if i'm not providing constant brain stimulation (kind of like mine did when i quit work). right now just isn't a good time for me to be consistent with that. there's too much craziness around here. i know that we're definitely going to be busy and it certainly won't be a summer of laying around, but that's ok. we may end up regretting our decision to do so many activities. i doubt it though. i guess we'll see.
i recently stumbled upon this on another blog , thepaynechatelaine, and it really spoke to how i have been feeling for a very long time. i have not been a regular attendee of church in quite a while. i could spend from now until a week from next friday talking about all of the reasons why i don't go to church, but i won't because they don't matter. while i was watching this video, i realized that all of my reasons weren't important because i was making a choice. i was making a choice to let all of my hang-ups get in the way of me worshiping. the songs, the ritualistic behaviors, the robotic feelings...none of that matters. what matters is what i do to worship God. what matters is what i feel in my heart about the Person that i am worshiping. it doesn't matter what i think about the songs or the way the message is presented. i need to stop being focused on how i feel during and after church and focus on worshiping and praising my loving God.
i have been very upset with myself for a long time because i believe it is my responsibility as a parent to provide our children with a place to worship...to teach them about God...to teach them how to pray and be good role models in the church family. we have always taught them about God...we read the Bible and Bible stories together, they went/go to a church-based preschool, they are all baptized, and once-in-a-while we take them to church. i want to get them and myself involved in our church again. this past weekend our baby was baptized...he's 15 months old a that was the first time he has ever been to church. that's a problem to me. i want to break the cycle. i need to get my head right and make a better choice.
me: (standing in the bathroom waiting for captain adventure to come take a bath) CA, please come here and go potty.
CA: i alweddy did.
me: um, where did you go potty? i'm in the bathroom and you haven't been in here.
CA: (silence)
me: CA? is there a problem?
CA: i go potty in my room.
me: where?
CA: behind the door.
(this conversation was followed by yet another conversation about where big boys do and do not go pee pee.)
***************
and since i have your attention, here's another captain adventure story...
little mother hen: mahm! come quick! CA is being unsafe!
me: (running up stairs) what's wrong?!
LMH: CA was standing in the sink.
me: (i'm sorry, what?!) CA! were you standing in the sink?
CA: (big wide eyes) yes mama.
me: (l-o-n-g lecture about being safe, the need for CA to stop acting like a monkey/animal and start acting like a little boy, etc...)
seriously?! i can't believe the things he does. i don't even know what to say sometimes. other people who i tell stories about CA to tell me that boys are just like this. you have got to be kidding me. they really have no common sense. i just don't get it.
me: um, why aren't you in your pajamas? please put your pajamas back on. it is time for bed.
captain adventure: (sad face, head down) i can't. they wet.
me: what do you mean they're wet?!
CA: i pee peed in them.
me: how is that possible? you were awake. where did this happen?
CA: in va bafwoom.
me: (after checking the bathroom...the floor was wet, his clothes were wet, and the stool that he does not use for any reason was wet) CA, what is the problem? why did you wet your pants? i don't think this was an accident. was this an accident?
CA: yes.
me: you don't get in trouble for accidents. everyone has accidents. i don't think this was an accident. you thought you had a pull-up on, didn't you? and that is why you went pee pee in your pants. is that what happened?
CA: yes. i faught i had a pull-up on.
me: when you are awake, you go pee pee in the toilet. pee pee in pull-ups is for sleeping only. do you understand?
CA: yes mama. (followed by lots and lots of tears)
me: i love you CA.
CA: i love you too mama.
when i consider my current living situation, i am reminded of the waltons. in the days of the waltons and other families like them, it was not uncommon for several generations to live together under the same roof. of course, in those times, nursing homes and assisted living apartments didn't exist, so the living arrangements were a natural progression of life. it was such a different time...two or three generations of women raising the children...grandpas, dads, and sons working together on the farm or at the mill...children at every stage of life living together under the same roof. they would scatter every morning...the children would go to school, the men would go to work, the women would start their housework or baking...and every afternoon, they would all return home and settle in for the night...preparing for supper, doing nighttime chores, completing homework...then they would all sit down together for supper. in the evening they didn't have 350 tv channels to choose from. they sat around and listened to the radio...or grandpa played the banjo...sometimes the women would pull out their knitting or needlepoint. it was a time to be together.
we (hubby, the kids and i) are living with my parents right now. we need a bigger house. we thought that the best way for us to sell our house would be to move out of it. so, my parents graciously offered for us to live with them. (well...maybe i graciously offered their house to us...but they never said no.) i'm sure we all trip other sometimes. i know our kids are loud. there are more dishes and laundry and more cooking and cleaning than before. but, it works. at least i think it does...we haven't gotten our pink slip yet. the kids love being with their grandparents. my parents love seeing their grandchildren when they wake up in the morning and snuggling with them before bedtime each night. i love having my kids and my parents in the same house.
recently my parents decided to ask grandma jingly keys to move in with us. after considering (for about five minutes) she accepted their invitation. so, for the past few weeks, we've been getting the house ready for her...french doors, new carpet, painting, rearranging the furniture, packing, moving...it has been really busy around here. i have to say that i am really looking forward to her living here. what a neat experience for our kids to have...living in the same house as their parents, grandparents, and great-grandma. i think its amazing. i am so excited for them.
we still have quite a list of things that need to be done before she can move in. every day, we do a little more. i hope it will be soon. until then, we'll be waiting for grandma.
so, we were sitting at the table eating dinner the other night and i was in mid-sentence when i noticed a problem...
(with shock in my voice) ME: um, little mother hen, did you cut your hair?
(with surprise and a straight face) LMH: no. is it cut?
ME: uh, really? you have no idea that your hair is cut? is that the story you're going to stick to?
LMH: yes, mama....(long pause)...um, actually, i forgot, i did cut it.
ME: where? when? how did this happen?
LMH: (giggling) oh. i forgot. i did it while mrs. teacher was in the office.
ME: so you did it at school?
LMH: no.
ME: someone else cut your hair?
LMH: (tears in her eyes) no. (l...o...n...g...pause...) oh wait. i was confused. it wasn't at school. it was upstairs.
ME: where did you get the scissors? when did you do this?
* this conversation continued like this for several more minutes...it took a while, but she finally admitted that she cut it so she could see what it would look like short and so that her "hair cut girl" would know where to cut. interesting.
soooo, if anyone needs a cut, let me know and we'll get you scheduled with little mother hen. she's quite creative.
